The Incredible Shrinking Sixth Grade

Throughout history the idea of abnormally small people has alway fascinated us. From epic novels like Gulliver’s Travels to classic movies like Honey I Shrunk The Kids, these stories have etched themselves into our minds mainly because of the intriguing tininess of the characters. I myself remember reading one of my favorite books, “The Borrowers,” cover-to-cover while wishing that the miniscule main characters could possible be real-life. And it seems they just might be.

2012 now welcomes into the Middle School children who seem to be just a bit shorter than normal. Perhaps you’re lounging around the second floor near Jeff Fetterman’s room, or just noticing height differences at recess—there’s something small about the new 6th graders. Just look at the class photos across from Jeff’s sixth grade homeroom, and watch as senior Middle Schoolers state begrudgingly, “I don’t remember being…that short.” It’s been stated by many in the Middle School community that the 6th graders seem to be a median height of 4’5″; there’s nothing wrong with that of course, but—it has been noticed. People are wondering and asking questions that they never have before, such as the fateful statement, why? After doing some research I came up with…well, nothing. Nothing except lots of kids around our age asking the same question, and coming up with not a single answer.

So, what do you think? Are kids shrinking as the generations pile up?

Or is all of this over-analogy coming from the fact that since we’re taller now, we couldn’t have ever been short?

Either way, I’m almost positive this isn’t a horror movie where children just keep getting smaller…and smaller…and…smaller.

Or is it?

Disclaimer: If you are a sixth grader and are at all offended by the piece above, please send your complaints to The Corner’s faculty advisors Rhonda Levy and/or Sarah Detwiler. Be prepared to have them in article format.

~photo by Rhonda Levy